rah62 (rah62) wrote in gayromantics,

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The Five-Date Rule

So as a way of introducing myself to the group, I thought I'd write about a discussion I had this morning with a gay guy who just got dumped by his "boyfriend" - mind you, they'd only been going out for a couple weeks, having rampant sex all over the place, and then the other guy just "lost interest".

I told my friend that I had a "Five-Date Rule" where I don't put out until after the fifth date - and then I might still not have sex with the guy if it doesn't feel right. But at the bare minimum, the first five dates are totally without sex. A good-night kiss is about as far as I'll go!

He said "this is the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard... how can you control your hormones?" I found that to be quite a bizarre comment. He seemed to feel that men are totally controlled by their sex drive, and when he sees a hot guy, he just has to have sex with him.

Anyhow, he didn't seem to get what I was trying to communicate - that in my mind, there are more important things in life than sex! Especially when you're meeting someone and exploring if they're potential dating/boyfriend material - why not give it a chance to get off the ground before you introduce sex into the equation? Besides - I've found my "Five-Date Rule" to be a very handy way to get rid of the guys who are interested in ONLY sex.

Sadly, the vast majority of guys don't make it to the fifth date. But, I like it as an effective screening tool.

So, do any of you have a similar rule?
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